After months of research—and more time than I care to admit talking to people who use words like “integration” and “smart systems”—I’ve finally upgraded the chickens. We now have an AI-powered nesting setup that tracks each hen’s laying schedule, productivity, and overall attitude. It connects right to my phone and sends alerts when a hen is thinking about laying an egg, in the process of laying one, or just sitting there pretending to be productive.
There’s even a feature that plays soft classical music in the nesting boxes to improve shell quality and reduce stress. Apparently Mozart is good for yolks. Who knew? So far, production is up… although one hen keeps pecking the sensor and another refuses to participate unless the music is changed. At the moment, I’ve got what I can only describe as a full-blown labor dispute going on in the coop.
Farming has come a long way.
For those that think I'm serious (aka, those that don't know me), yes, this is an April Fool’s joke. My chickens won’t even cooperate with an automatic door. There is absolutely no chance they’re syncing with an app.
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